- I was arguing with my girlfriend back in college days some umpteen years ago...when right smack dab at the peaky peak of my most concerted point, a bird poop landed straight across my face from eyebrow to chin...it wasn't a little sparrow poop...it was a gnarly gigantic seagull turd, and based on what seagulls eat...it was nasty smelling and tasting. Yuuuuck...of course my girlfriend laughed at me as I shrunk into a mental hole about the size of a penny! AH
- We picked Tim Celek up from the airport for the second time. We were reminiscing in the car with Tim and my husband, Dave, about the first time we picked Tim up and our dog, Listo, broke into Tim’s backpack and ate his power bars and trail mix. I said "TIM, REMEMBER WHEN LISTO UNZIPPED YOUR ZIPPER AND ATE YOUR NUTS?" - OMG I was so embarrassed!! JM
- I burned my ear with the curling iron. Very painful. Next day I felt a scab, but I left it alone...for 3 days...only to find out that it wasn't a scab at all, it was a "Made in China" label from my cheap sunglasses. PH
- My mom, younger sister and I were trying clothes on in a department store – one of those stores with all the departments on one floor. We were having fun with bathing suits, shirts, shorts, jeans, dresses, etc. Three women looking to shop. Well, my mom and sister were wandering in the middle of the department store and I wanted their feedback on the jeans I tried on. So I walked into the middle of the department store to ask what they thought. We looked in the mirror, I turned around a couple of times, and we all decided the jeans were good. We were getting lots of stares from people so I just guessed everyone thought the jeans looked good. That is until I looked in the mirror and to my horror realized I forgot to put back on my shirt after trying on a bathing suit…and I was standing in the middle of the department store with men, women & children. OMG – and my mom & sister didn’t even realize it either until I screamed and ran back to the dressing room. Nice!! DC
- My high school buddy and I took the train to Madison Square Garden to buy scalped tickets to a New York Knicks vs. Chicago Bulls playoff game (1993 I think). We were 17 at the time and we lived in New Jersey. Being paranoid kids, we heard of stories about undercover policeman arresting people attempting to purchase scalped tickets. We didn't have enough nerve to try and buy tickets outside of the arena, so we went across the street. Still paranoid, we approached a guy who said he had tickets. We asked how much the tickets were. He said $70 each. Being 17, stupid, and paranoid we paid him the money WITHOUT looking at the tickets. Trying not to be obvious, we ran around the closest building to look at our tickets away from undercover policeman's eyes. When we looked at them, they were two tickets for the MONGOLIAN Circus at the arena on another day! My buddy is pretty tall, so believe it or not we found the scalper and demanded our money back. He actually gave it to us. So what do two 17 year old males, do? Of course we tried a second time. This time, we found a scalper and looked at the tickets. They said, Knicks vs. Bulls on the correct day. Roughly the same amount of money. We walk up to the garden, got in line and slowly move towards the turnstiles. With about 2 people in front of us, we gave our tickets one more glance. Mystically, we both realized something about the tickets at the exact same time. The Knicks and Bulls played in the playoffs on the exact same day the year before! The tickets were from the previous year!!! Once again, we tried to locate the scalper, but this time we couldn't. We managed to pawn the tickets off to some Jr. scalpers in training to get most of our money back and RAN into the train station. Our train wasn't due to leave for a couple hours so we hid WAY back in a restaurant paranoid that the Jr. scalpers would alert their mentors and we would be hunted down and assaulted. We sprinted to our train at the time of its departure, and rode home with our heads in our hands defeated by the New York city scalpers. We also missed half of the game on TV because there was no Tivo or DVR at the time! CR
- Saying "you're pregnant too!" when trying to let a woman go in front of me in line at the Angels game consession stands was embarassing because SHE WASN'T. JN
Tim Celek
